I was irritated when my colleague responded vaguely to an invitation to the office party I’d ‘volunteered’ to organize.
Underneath my martyrish ‘how could she be so dismissive when I’ve made the effort to organize this party?’ I resented her ability to be non-committal.
When encouraged to organize the event at a particularly busy time, I’d felt the need to immediately commit. What I hadn’t embraced was the ‘let me think about it’ or better still ‘thank you for asking, and no’.
I was resentful that she’d given herself permission to respond this way when I hadn’t allowed myself to.
I’d negated my own needs and truth, and given a ‘yes’ based on the fear of losing the image of a dependable friend and colleague.
What started as irritation became admiration and gratitude for what my colleague taught me.
When do you feel resentful, and what’s the underlying lesson?